Speak to me inside of her. That was the word the Lord whispered into my heart the day I hit my knees in prayer for a friend. I had struggled in our relationship. We were in a Bible study together and it seemed that no matter how I tried to encourage her in her walk with the Lord, my words were either received as judgmental or legalistic. Where the tension was coming from, I didn’t really know, but what was certain is that I cared about her ... Read More about Speak Forth
Mentoring
Why Life Is Not Meant to Be Lived Alone
I was surrounded by ladies yet had never felt so alone. The new girl, I assumed loneliness was my new normal. I never went back to that women's ministry event. Instead, I chose aloneness. Making friends, being vulnerable, living in community felt too hard. Last week, I went back to the same women's ministry as a guest speaker. The same place I had felt so alone, the same place I refused to return, the same place that had been so ... Read More about Why Life Is Not Meant to Be Lived Alone
Do You Need A Mentor-In-A-Box?
You will always hear me advocating for a real-life mentor: someone who knows you, who sees you on a regular basis, who can cheer you on in your struggles, and call you out on your sins. A mentorship is a relationship, and a good one takes time and trust to develop. I have been blessed to have several mentors in different life seasons, and I am deeply grateful for their investment in my life. But what if you simply can’t find anyone who fills ... Read More about Do You Need A Mentor-In-A-Box?
Where to Start When You Want a Mentor (Or Want to Be One)
Her name was Lynne. She had shoulder-length, wavy hair that was a blend of red and brown hues which framed her soft, pale face and infectious smile. Her titles were many: pastor’s wife, mother, homeschool mama, Sunday school teacher, puppet team coach, friend, and more. But I called her Mama Hobbes. She was part of my life before I can even remember. I never asked her to be my mentor and she never asked if I wanted a mentor; she was just ... Read More about Where to Start When You Want a Mentor (Or Want to Be One)
Why Experience Is Not a Qualification for Mentoring
“It’s so wonderful to see you! How are you?” We talked a mile a minute as we began to catch up. Old friends from our high school homeschool group, we hadn’t seen each other in years. We were so much the same, and yet so different. “What do you want to be doing?” she asked as we finished reminiscing about the past and began to share future dreams. I looked more closely at my old friend. Would she understand what I wanted to share? I took a ... Read More about Why Experience Is Not a Qualification for Mentoring
How to Bring Discipleship Out of Bible Study Into Life
“What are you going to do to change the world for God?” I blinked across the table at Ken Bevel, leading actor in the then soon be released movie “Courageous”. We were talking about the weather and where we were all from and then, all of a sudden, that question. Stunned, I scrambled for words, searching my heart. What did I want to do to change the world for God? As the waiters brought out dessert, I answered something about helping people ... Read More about How to Bring Discipleship Out of Bible Study Into Life
what to do with your mother’s heart when you have no child of your own
Some women are born with a child-shaped hole in their hearts. The hole is meant for a child – or a lot of children – of their own. Why try to pretend it’s meant for anything else? In Becoming God’s True Woman, Dorothy Kelley Patterson writes: “If you are a woman, whether you are married or single and whether or not you have physical children, there is a maternal spirit within your very nature. That maternal spirit has been given you by God ... Read More about what to do with your mother’s heart when you have no child of your own
Where are the Spiritual Mothers? A Titus 2 Vision for Friendship
"I just need some help." This wasn't the first time total and utter exhaustion had settled in. Being pregnant with number three made for many challenges while chasing a toddler and spending countless hours on the city bus getting my bigger one to school. "Can you call someone to come over?" my husband asked. My mind went blank. All of my close friends were in the trenches, just like me. Besides that, as much as an extra set of hands ... Read More about Where are the Spiritual Mothers? A Titus 2 Vision for Friendship
I Prayed for a Mentor
Many years ago, my husband was called to join the ministry staff of a church in a city new to us. The women in the church invited me to a ladies’ tea to welcome me and help me become acquainted with them. I was only twenty-three years old, so most of the women there were older than I was. When I was asked to give a spontaneous short speech, I appealed to the women for a mentor, someone who would fulfill the Titus 2 role in my life. I knew there ... Read More about I Prayed for a Mentor
Making Room for Mentoring in Your World
I was eleven years old – bookish, imaginative, shy, average – when I met Bethany. I had outgrown any possible cuteness, but not yet grown into any possible maturity. Bethany was sixteen. She was beautiful, creative, ridiculously intelligent, and with an effortless poise that was never intimidating, only kind. Her bookshelves groaned under the weight of her amazing personal library, and her composition books – which she let me look through and ... Read More about Making Room for Mentoring in Your World
The Coming Alongside Part of Mentoring
Does the word “mentoring” sting your soul, reminding you once again that you’ve never felt more alone? Have you longed for someone to speak into your life and invest time into you personally? Maybe you’re an older woman, sincerely hoping God would slow down one single younger gal long enough for you to connect with her in an authentic way. Oh friend, no matter how you feel about mentoring, you’re not alone. While I’ve met a few women who have ... Read More about The Coming Alongside Part of Mentoring
How to Find the Fountain of Youth
When I was an awkward, anxious twenty-something who felt hopelessly crippled by shyness, it dawned on me one day that even a stick-in-the-mud might actually be transformed into the kind of person who joyfully welcomes new people, new adventures, and new growth in my heart. It might be possible to be born “old” and steadily grow younger. As Exhibit A, I had my maternal grandmother, the most young-at-heart person I knew. Despite the ... Read More about How to Find the Fountain of Youth
