When Motherhood is Filled with the Overwhelming Ache of Fear
Motherhood

When Motherhood is Filled with the Overwhelming Ache of Fear

Stepping into motherhood was a fear-filled journey for me. I’m probably not alone in that, but it was a surprise to me just how impossibly overwhelmed I felt by the weight and ache of fear.  The reality of the cliché proved almost debilitating as I lived with my heart outside my body and felt the pinch of each painful new milestone.

For When You’re Laying the Foundation (and it doesn’t feel fruitful yet)
Motherhood

For When You’re Laying the Foundation (and it doesn’t feel fruitful yet)

For months now they’ve been working. Churning up dirt and wreaking mayhem, mostly in the early morning when cars are rushing by on their commute, but often during school pick-up hours, too. A slew of men with hard hats and orange vests intermingling with pig-tailed girls and running boys eager to beat them to the crosswalk.

For weeks I’ve watched those men lay cones, put up barriers, and direct me through the chaos. It seems they’re getting very little done.

When Motherhood Comes in Weakness
Motherhood

When Motherhood Comes in Weakness

I’m not much of a mom these days. At least, that’s what I’m tempted to feel like when I see all the other moms dashing here and there, taking their kids to sports practice and volunteering in their classroom, hosting big birthday parties and planning fun vacations. My son has a mom who spends much of her time in bed, in a recliner, and in doctors’ offices. 

There are moments when I grieve who I can’t be for my 11-year-old, when I mourn the ways my terminal cancer diagnosis has laid heavy burdens on my son’s young shoulders.

How do I raise an extroverted daughter when I’m an introvert?
Motherhood

How do I raise an extroverted daughter when I’m an introvert?

My daughter is extremely extroverted and I’m a classic introvert. I feel guilty sometimes because I keep her home a lot when she’d rather go and see people. Am I hurting her development by not going out more? -An Introverted Mom It’s fascinating to me how certain narratives get started in society and how quickly…

You Brought Me So Much Joy, Little One (a story of miscarriage)
Infertility & Miscarriage

You Brought Me So Much Joy, Little One (a story of miscarriage)

Gilia.  That’s the name I chose for the little one we lost, the baby who passed from my womb before we had announced her presence. It’s Hebrew, pronounced Ghee-lee-yah, and means Eternal Joy.   She was too small to know for sure her gender, but my husband said from the moment I showed him the…

Mercy Womb
Infertility & Miscarriage

Mercy Womb

“And her offspring will crush the head of the serpent…” (Genesis 3:15) The opening three chapters of Genesis are known to most of us for their purpose in describing the origin of life, and establishing the character of God as creator.  The depth of these few chapters; however, is as unending as God is eternal. …

The End.

The End.