What About Me?


What about the daughters whose fathers never wanted them and abandoned them before they were even born? Like me. – Rachel

Dear Rachel,

Thank you so much for asking this question. It is one that is burning within the hearts of so many women, young and old alike.

How I wish I could be right beside you and listen to your heart…and your story! I would give you a big hug and whisper in your ear what my Heavenly Father has taught me and so many of my friends.

Rachel, you may have been abandoned, but you were never forgotten. Rachel, you may have been forsaken, but you were always loved. Rachel, you may have been unwanted, but you were always desired.

The very One who knit you together in your mother’s womb, who gave you your first breath of life is the one who created the sunshine to filter into your bed as a baby and tickle you awake. He delights in you this very moment. (“For the LORD your God is living among you. He is a mighty savior. He will take delight in you with gladness. With His love, he will calm all your fears. He will rejoice over you with joyful songs” – Zephaniah 3:17.)

You are His child much more than you are your biological father’s child. Your Father has a purpose and plan for you. He didn’t just create your body. He created your emotions and desires, your talents and passions. And He loves you. Especially if you have accepted, Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, you have every right to call Him Father! It is for you, Rachel, to allow your heart to receive His Fatherly Love.

The Holy Scriptures are replete with examples of our Creator as our loving Father. He even asks us to converse with him daily as we would our earthly father. Just think of the Lord’s Prayer. He commands us to acknowledge him as “Our Father.” We are to follow the example of Jesus. In the times of great distress and separation, such as while He was on the cross, He cried out “Abba, Father” which is the equivalent of you or me, Rachel, saying “Daddy, Daddy”! Don’t be afraid to call on your real Daddy!

You know, there was a young lady who found herself in a similar situation to yours. She was both fatherless and motherless. Her life illustrates the truth of God as our Heavenly Father better than I ever could. The story of Esther is real and authentic. Rachel, as you read about her life, don’t think of it so much as an ancient Cinderella story. Think of it more as your story, your destiny!

In all this heartache, God will be your father, Rachel! He will also be faithful to provide someone to be your “father figure.” It may be one person, a relative like Mordecai, or someone in your Church, even an older brother, or it may be various people that the Lord sends in to your life at just the right time. One might be there to give you advice, another to protect you, another to lift you up when the going gets tough.

Don’t reject those that the Lord wants to use in your life. Let him pour out His mercy and love on you from his father-heart just as He did in the life of Esther. He is faithful to fulfill His promises, and care for his daughters, “And I will restore to you the years that the locust hath eaten, the cankerworm, and the caterpillar, and the palmerworm, my great army which I sent among you” (Joel 2:25).


  1. I was so touched by this post today! Tears welled up in my eyes and my heart was burdened as I thought of all of the young people out there who have been abandoned or have felt unwanted at one time or another. Elysse, your words were so sweet and inspiring, and truly reminded me again of God’s great love for me. I am going through some difficult times in my own life right now, and this post has helped renew my desire to seek rest in Him. He is the ONLY one who can give me true peace and joy, the only one who truly knows how my heart sorrows and can bring a smile again to my face. He only wants me to seek Him and He will give me rest!

  2. This is so very true. My birth “father” left my family at a very young age. My mother later remarried a wonderful man who I galdly call daddy=]. God helped ease my pain and taught me to lean on Him as my strength. Rachel if you read this please know I am praying for you.
    God bless

  3. Such a sweet writing. Our heavenly father never leaves us though our earthly fathers sometimes do. For various reasons and at various times. I’m 42 and was very close to my father. He was not a saved man but he was my father. He chose to take his own life last year and oh the pain that has been left with me. God has held my hand and has seen me through some very difficult days. He’s the best. Look to Him for all things. He will never leave us or forsake us.

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