A Spinster Looks at Proverbs 31

It was lunch break, and I was sitting down for a quick “Bible snack” when my eyes fell on Proverbs 31:26: “The law of kindness is on her tongue.” Though I’ve read it a thousand times, this time it went right to the quick. Uh-oh. You mean, kindness to the classmate who is doing his utmost to replace the pesty older brother I never had?

I’ve heard this passage applied to married women; I’ve even heard it applied to single women in general, but now I began rereading it with a whole new sense that it was written for me.

(Feel free to listen in: you just might come up with an application to your own life!)

A worthy woman who can find? For her price is far above rubies. The heart of her husband trusteth in her, and he shall have no lack of gain.

Hmmm, no husband, but I do have a boss. Can he trust me to be follow all the rules of my workplace, even though no one is watching me?

She doeth him good and not evil all the days of her life.

There are no days off from honesty.

She seeketh wool and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands.

I’m seeking out research material, not wool and flax, but am I working with it willingly? Or am I trying to get done studying Pliny as fast as possible so I can move on to more appealing topics?

She is like the merchant-ships; she bringeth her bread from afar.

…and sometimes in a backpack. I used to hate shopping, but God is helping me to turn it into an adventure.

She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth food to her household, and their task to her maidens.

Probably this means making sure the house is ready for guests in a timely manner. Bathrooms clean? Coffee pot on? Cookies served? Or am I rushing around at the last minute?

She considereth a field, and buyeth it; with the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard.

I wonder what this means in my case. Certainly that I ought to be investing in the future, with whatever talents God has given me – and not merely getting caught up in the demands of today.

She girdeth her loins with strength, And maketh strong her arms.

She sounds pretty “in shape” to me! Fortunately, though I am by no means a sports-player, I do love to walk –and have plenty of places to walk to. I think it keeps me happier and more balanced spiritually and emotionally.

She perceiveth that her merchandise is profitable: Her lamp goeth not out by night.

This does not mean staying up all night, much as I’d be tempted to interpret it that way! I’ve heard that in Bible times, a nightlight was kept burning in the house. However, if someone forgot to fill it before they went to bed –out it would go. Much as I’d love to burn the midnight oil, I find that I can’t give my best work to God or my employer if I don’t get enough sleep.

She layeth her hands to the distaff, and her hands hold the spindle.

No sewing is going on in this house, but certainly I can be reminded to make use of the small moments in the day, rather than frittering them away on things that neither refresh me nor fulfill the goals God has given me. Uh-oh. I’m sure some of my internet use falls in that category.

She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy.

A good reminder to give the commodity most precious to me: time. If I get lonely, don’t some of the friends I’ve been neglecting feel the same way? This reminds me of a lovely promise that comes from the marginal reading of Isaiah 58:10:”Give to the hungry what your soul desires…” As a single girl, what do you desire most? Kindness? Love? A simple acknowledgment that someone knows you exist? If you give that out, “…then shall your light rise in darkness, and your obscurity be as the noonday; and the LORD will guide you continually, and satisfy your soul in dry places, and make strong your bones; and you shall be like a watered garden, and like a spring of water, whose waters fail not.”

She is not afraid of the snow for her household; for all her household are clothed with scarlet. She maketh for herself carpets of tapestry; her clothing is fine linen and purple.

Sounds like a pretty classy lady to me. I’m certain that it pleases God when I put out the effort to show that knowing Him makes His daughters more beautiful. I’m certain it blesses others when my dress is neither too dull nor too bold, but refreshing, sunshiny, and restful to the eye.

Her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land.

Staying in the background and helping to make my boss look good is pretty easy, but consistently honoring him in my attitude is something that only comes from Jesus.

She maketh linen garments and selleth them, and delivereth girdles unto the merchant.

This lady is a real entrepreneur…something I’ve never dreamed of being. I wonder what God will teach me about this one?

Strength and dignity are her clothing; and she laugheth at the time to come.

Ah yes. I can stand tall because I’m His.

She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and the law of kindness is on her tongue.

I think the Holy Spirit wants to remind me that as a woman, I’ve got influence I can use for good, if I’ll work with Him on it. And there’s no need to use sarcasm to defend myself from teasing. If I stick to gentleness, He’ll look out for me.

She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.

This is becoming a joy to do, but it takes a choice. As a naturally dreamy person, I could tune out needs and resent the interruptions of everyday life…or I can enjoy keeping a beautiful, well-stocked apartment.

Her children rise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her, saying: Many daughters have done worthily, but thou excellest them all. Grace is deceitful, and beauty is vain; but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised.

Did you know that this is a promise? If you fear Him, you’ll be praised. Period. I’ve discovered (to my surprise) that you don’t need a husband and children to receive appreciation and love and recognition for the things that Jesus is doing in you. He knows how to get the message through to you, and sometimes He’ll use the most unexpected people.

Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her works praise her in the gates.

And even if no person notices what you do, for every secret sacrifice, every obedient action, and every beautiful attitude, oh how real is His approval and love!

Related: Elisabeth’s post on Proverbs 31 over at Modern Ruth Project

Photography: JenniMarie Photography