by Kellie Mendoza

Girls who are in relationships seem to always think that those of us who are not are getting tired of hearing about their relationships, their happiness, their joy, their men.

So, all you girls who are fallen to twitterpation, I’m gonna let you in on a little secret.

We’re not.

There is more than one reason for this.

1. We are your friends. When you’re hurt, we hurt with you. When you’re sad, we’re sad with you. When you’re mad, we’re mad with you. And when you smile, we smile with you. When you are joyful, it is our pleasure to share that joy with you. We love to see you happy. We love to see the beautiful things that the Lord is unfolding for you as you grow; because we’re watching you grow in many areas – as a person, in your relationship with your special man, and, most importantly, in the Lord. Seeing those things brings us joy because we love you.

2. We have known you when there was not a special someone. We now know you when there is one. And we can watch and grow, too, as we learn from you the things that we will be glad to know someday when our turns come.

3. Being that we have known you before there was a special someone, and now know you when there is, we are able to see how quickly things change…how fast they go from having “no one” to suddenly having “someone.” The someone. And it is so encouraging because we are able to see what we have to look forward to; it reminds us that when we stay the course, and continue going about our lives growing in Christ, and getting closer to Him; as we continue to do things His way, remaining chaste and pure, and waiting for the one that He has prepared for us; and as we continue waiting on the Lord, that He will give us the desires of our hearts.

4. The world is so inundated with romance done the wrong way. It’s everywhere we turn. We see that, and know that we will never get our own romance in those ways. And it seems hopeless. Until we see you folks. And then we get that reminder of what we have to hope for if we continue to be committed to doing things the right way.

So please, you who are courting or in relationships, don’t stop talking about it. Don’t stop sharing your joy. Don’t stop posting pictures. It’s one way that the Lord reminds us of the hope that we have for our future romances, done the right way.

Please don’t stop.


  1. Anonymous says:

    I agree completely . . . thanks for encouraging the girls that have been blessed by courtship to share their stories. It reafirms that I’m on the right track. Courtship really works! In a world of dating, it’s amazing how many strange looks (and scores of questions) that people give you when you try to explain just why you’re not dating! ๐Ÿ™‚ It’s wonderful to be able to log on and see how God is working in your lives and KNOW that, this truly is the way that God has called me and that, someday, I’ll be my turn. It renews my commitment to wait for my prince . . .. but meanwhile, to grow closer and closer to my Savior. Thank you from the bottom of my heart!

  2. Catherine says:

    Amen… I feel the same way as my friends are courting/in relationships- It is such a hopeful thing to see their happiness, and to dream of my own, perhaps someday…

  3. Anonymous says:


    And I can add another reason: seeing my friends going through the difficulties inherent in a relationship with another person helps me to pause and realize what real romance is like! One dear friend has told me something like “it isn’t all easy, happy, lovey-dovey stuff!” and that is good for me to hear. Since I haven’t been there yet, it is SO easy to romanticize what it will be like when it comes. It’s much better to appreciate the easy points of being single (this leads to more contentment!), meanwhile honing those communication and problem-resolving skills!

    Just some thoughts.
    <3 Gretchen R.

  4. I agree…only, please give me a little “sentimental mush” in the mix. =)

  5. lol, sure y’all, post whatever you want to! It’s your blog. ๐Ÿ˜‰ The giddy posts make me grin. Gretchen probably just gets less comments on those, because there’s not much to say in response. ๐Ÿ˜‰

  6. Anonymous says:

    Wonderful post!

    I too, enjoy and find encouraging love done God’s way!

    It’s refreshing. . .there are others like me!!

    ALso, I have very much enjoyed the Courtship stories! Thank you all y’all!

    Psalm 16:11

  7. Anonymous says:

    I am to serve as a bride’s maid this May. Sharing in my friend’s joy has been a treat, as well as a hopeful foretaste of the joy God will bring with the right man. As Bethany said, it’s encouraging to know that good guys ARE out there and are ready for commitment. I’ve wondered if they were all being kept in a holding tank, but the out break of engagements says otherwise. ๐Ÿ™‚ Thanks to Kellie for reminding us to be joyful, and to praise God for relationships that honor Him! ~ Jenna

  8. Kellie, what precious thoughts…and thanks Natalie for passing them on. It is the truest of friends that can share both sorrow AND joy. And I agree–my best friends all married before I did, and what a witness they were for what I was waiting for! God bless…

  9. Anonymous says:

    I love to hear courtship stories as long as they don’t have all sorts of sentimental mush in them. lol

  10. Anonymous says:

    I agree, Gretchen -we would love to hear about and share your excitement. From time to time it is difficult to hear about a lot of peers finding that special person and the relationship growing when I, at age 21, have no one in my life and no one that I know as a possibility of anything happening. But, to hear that there are still quality guys out there who are going about relationships the right way is an encouragement to me- it gives me hope that God can bring the right person along- and it is going to be a great story to tell others one day because it will be His doing.
    We would love to share in your excitement and look forward to what God will do in our lives in His timing.


  11. Thank you so much for this wonderful post! The first of my closest friends just began being courted and so I was very blessed to read this. It really expresses how I feel!
    Truly, the Lord does use our friends to remind us of His perfect love and plan!

  12. Amen. Thankfully, I have yet to see any reason for jealousy in my friends’ happiness…it makes it seem MORE likely, not less, that someday I’ll be similarly blessed. Meanwhile, I can rejoice so gleefully in God’s great goodness! Thanks for the reminder, Natalie and Kellie.

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