5 Things I’ve Learned in 5 Years of Motherhood

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Five years ago, I became a mother, giving birth to our firstborn during the first uncertain month of the pandemic. Similar to how the year 2020 tilted the world, my little six-pound-nothing baby changed my entire life overnight – and she and her brother have just kept on changing it with each new baby milestone, toddler word learned, and the dawn of the “little girl” era. 

I’m still very much a mom of littles (our daughter is now a feisty five and our son is a terrific two) but I’m peeking over at the seasons to come as she grows into a kindergartener and beyond far too fast. Just five short years into my motherhood journey, here are five things I’ve learned to prioritize every day that I think will serve me well in the years to come:

1. Spending Time in the Word Nourishes Your Soul

When you first enter motherhood, time to yourself can feel like a dream that you’ve long since woken up from, but settling into a new rhythm and routine was essential to making me feel like myself again. One of the first habits I scheduled into my day was a simple sit-down time to study God’s Word using a guided Bible study – at night! Since my morning routine still fluctuates around a toddler, I study my Bible in the evenings after bedtime and love how it relaxes me for sleep. 

Do what works for you! Don’t feel pressured to complete the whole day’s “homework” at once – sometimes those 10-week studies take me 10 months! I also have a prayer journal for days when I have more than four minutes.

And for the days when all else fails, listen to the Bible. The ESV Bible app has a handy (and free) play button! If the day is going down the drain or everyone has the flu, you can still soak in the timeless truths of Scripture as you wash (or re-wash) yet another load of laundry. Sometimes I read only one verse from the Psalms before I fall into bed at night. Scripture sustains. Your children will notice long before you think they do.

2. Discipling Your Children is Simpler than You Think

When my daughter was about 18 months old, I started using simple scripts that helped anchor her in my expectations of, love for, and delight in her. Before she even really understood the concepts, I would repeat those refrains to her like a daily liturgy of love. 

Here are some of our favorites that have stood the test of time and live on the side of our fridge. She learned to repeat them back to me far sooner than I expected, and we’ve now taught most of them to her brother. Children love to learn and memorize, and this sort of family catechism serves as a touchstone to our relationship.

• What’s Mommy’s and Daddy’s job? To love you and keep you safe.
• What’s Rosalie’s job? Listen and obey.
• How do you listen and obey? Right away, all the way, happy way.
• What does right away mean? Now, not later. I can ask why as I obey.
• Wherever you go, whatever you do, you can always come home to us because we love you!
• No matter how big you grow, wherever you go, you’ll always be my baby RoRo!
• We are a family and being a family means we’re a team. What do teams do? Work together!

As my children have grown, I’ve also been delighted to find a plethora of resources available to help teach them about faith. We own multiple children’s Bibles, which we read from during Family Worship Time at bedtime every night. We also heartily recommend the card sets from the Tiny Theologians shop! We use these cards at mealtimes to help cement us all in the Truth and spark conversations.

3. Prioritize Sunshine and Fresh Air

I remember recovering from childbirth by celebrating small walks to my mailbox; then outside time became a daily habit that helped break up our day and refresh us all. I find that even a few moments outside restores equilibrium so that when we do come back inside, the to-do list doesn’t overwhelm me quite as much and my little helpers are more eager to lend a hand! The more I learn about (and experience) the positive effects of fresh air and sunshine, the more time I spend outside. We are blessed to live in a very walkable neighborhood but even enjoying your backyard can be so beneficial to young bodies and souls – and your own! 

I love the book Until the Streetlights Come On by Ginny Yurich, the creator of the 1,000 Hours Outside movement, for more on this. Although I don’t count our hours, we look for local activities to enjoy the outdoors and go for almost-daily walks as a family. It’s great exercise, too!

4. The Bible is the Best Parenting Book

I have always enjoyed learning about each new life stage I am in by reading an abundance of books about it. When I was dating and engaged, I read dozens of marriage books. When I found out I was pregnant, I started a new Goodreads tag to track the 80+ parenting books I’ve now read (my favorites are in a list here!). Now that our little girl will start kindergarten this fall, I have several books on homeschooling on my list to read this summer.

But nothing beats the Bible for ages-old advice on the human soul from the Creator who knit us together in our mother’s womb. The best parenting wisdom is actually always Biblical wisdom. From exhortations on discipling children during everyday routines (Deuteronomy 6), to the familiar family and household codes of Ephesians and Colossians, the Word of God is the strongest foundation for our families.

5. Pray for – and with – your children

As I come to the end of this list, my mind is full of approximately 582 pieces of advice I’d like to give to you as generously as they were shared with me (“Do the dishes every night! Morning you will be glad and grateful!” “Greet your husband first when he comes home!” “Remind siblings that they’re teammates!” “Feeling lonely? Invite others over for a play date, park date, dessert date, book club; don’t be afraid to go first and be the inviter!”). 

The truth is, all those practical, helpful things pale in comparison to the Helper we’re promised in John 15. When the baby won’t sleep, sing hymns over him and pray he comes to know the One who holds you in the night watch. When the car won’t start (again!), ask God for the strength to face another repair. I’ve even prayed for hand-me-down clothes for our growing children and had bags show up on our front door that day.

Most of all, pray for and with your children. Ever since I learned of their existence, I’ve prayed for my children’s salvation, faith, future life’s work and families. Motherhood has stretched me like I’ve never known – and prayer has held me together through it all, as only He can. God is faithful, even when I am not. He is present, no matter what.

I’d love to hear what you think of these five truths in the comments section below. What would you add?

Photography: Jenni Marie Photography